Evan P. Donohue vs. Tyler Bryant! Heartbeater vs. Courtney Jaye! Chancellor Warhol vs. Majestico! It’s a battle for the ages at Mercy Lounge tonight.

This Craigslist poster is an opossum. We’re sure of it.

Sound the alarms, Chipotle is giving away BOGO coupons for burritos! Watch a commercial for some dumb show and get hooked up, y’all.

At long last, we enter the hallowed halls of East Side hipster Valhalla — No. 308. Was it worth the wait? Oh sweet lord, yes.

Take a break from staring at the house owned by that girl you’ve got a crush on and peep some street art, you weirdo.

Fascism, the most wily of all political systems, is apparently lurking somewhere on Belcourt Avenue, just past the movie theater. We’re onto you, McDougal’s.

Happy Dr. Dre Day, everyone! Celebrate with free 40s at The Groove, like a true American patriot.

Hey ladies! Are you a loser? Do you want to get with another loser? Want to play video games and watch American Dad in an awkwardly platonic relationship? We got your man.

Yet another ill-fated journey to Bar No. 308 ends in your humble bloggers drinking Four Loko and watching Portlandia On Demand. It’s not the worst idea we’ve had, but it sure wasn’t a great one.

The weather cleared up long enough for us to stalk the city in search of fresh graffiti to glorify, like this chipper bus bench near Belmont.