FRIDAY

Legal Limits Cassette Release Show w/ Millionaire Magicians & Action! – The Family Wash – 9:00pm, FREE

Southern rockers/members of just about every band in East Nashville, The Legal Limits, will be gracing the Family Wash this evening for their cassette release show of Hot Pursuit. The EP was recorded back in 2007 by beloved East-sider and Cater Administrator, Andy Willhite, and mastered by Jeremy “Battletapes” Ferguson, which means you’re basically going to eat this shit up. Rounding out the bill are DD favorites, Action!, and the Millionaire Magicians. Cassette releases? Who do these people think they are, Infinity Cat bands?

The Features w/Bows and Arrows & Tristen – 12th and Porter – 7:00PM, $10

So, hey, we love The Features. This is about the least controversial statement a blog in Nashville can make about anything. Did you guys watch the premiere of Circus on PBS? We didn’t because we were too busy having our ears molested by Die Antwoord at Cannery, but we heard that it uses a Features song as its theme, and that’s pretty cool. Bows & Arrows, who we almost booked for our 8 Off 8th last month, and Tristen are opening. If you’re not too lazy to leave the East Side, you should catch this show.

SATURDAY

Belcourt Seat Sale – The Belcourt – 12:00pm-3:00pm, $726

Hope you’ve been saving your pennies. The Belcourt is pulling out the seats in the 1966 theater (that’s the smaller one that was stained by last weekend’s Rocky Horror screenings) to replace them with fancy new ones that you won’t fall through. Loathe to miss a fundraising opportunity, the theater is offering to trade their old seats in exchange for donations. They don’t tell you how much you should donate, but they do mention that the new seats cost around $250, so you may want to keep that in mind. If you’re feeling really fancy, you can buy a set for $500 from the bigger theater. It comes with a plaque!

First Saturday Art Crawl – The Arcade and Downtown – 6:00pm, FREE

You know what’s better than drinking free booze? Drinking free booze while walking in circles. Tomorrow is the first Saturday in November, so not only can you get that circle walking and free booze consuming out of your system, you can pretend to look at some art, too. Y’all know the drill. If you need a primer on how to drink at the art crawl, you may want to refer back to our original experiment.

Old Fashioned Pie Throw – Blend (in the Arcade) – 6:00pm, FREE to attend, $5 to participate

While you’re at the art crawl, you may want to do this. Whatever the hell this is. We really aren’t sure, it can’t be as obvious as it sounds. Or can it? In any case, you can watch for free, but if you want to throw pies in an old-fashioned fashion, you’ll have to put up $5. More information that will be of zero actual use to you can be found on Isle of Printing’s blog.

Turbo Fruits w/Big Surr & others – Glenn Danzig’s House – 7:00pm, $5

It’s a show in Nashville’s best place to see shows in a basement (that isn’t “The Basement”). Honestly, there’s not a whole lot more to say about it than that. Turbo Fruits, D. Watusi and Deadbeat Beat are playing. So are 8 Off 8th alums Big Surr and Reid Magette. BYOB (probably), don’t hang out in front of the house or on the street, don’t be a jerk. If you don’t know the address, you may want to Google around for it.

// Photo by Seth Lemmons.

On the off chance that you lapsed into a brief coma over the past  few days, Halloween happened last weekend and saucy costumed Craigslisters were missing connections with people in animal suits and Mad Men left and right. Fortunately for you, we’re not going to write about that shit. If you want publicity for your hypothetical love affair with period clothing (and the dude/lady inside those clothes, we suppose), you’re going to have to find some other sucker. We will, however, bring you a missed connection not for love, but for a pretentious vegan t-shirt at the Springwater.

Person of Craigslist: Erin (AKA: Shirt-Lover of a Female Morrissey Impersonator)

Category: Missed Connections

Who Is She:

You came to Scareoke and blew my mind with your Morrissey impersonation. I love Morrissey and I’m really happy you came and did that. You have short brown hair and was wearing a blue jacket, but the best thing that you wore that night was your shirt.

I am not a lesbian, but I am in love with your “Ugly People Eat Meat” shirt.
I WANT ONE
I will give you whatever you ask for it. I’ve been vegan for 9 years and I’d love to wear one at Thanksgiving this year.
My name is Erin. I was the girl with long, dark hair, sitting in the closest booth to the stage, your right.
Please message me back so we can work this out.
“Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want”
Good times for a change/ See, the luck I’ve had/ Can make a good man/ Turn bad/ So please, please, please/ Let me, let me, let me/ Let me get what I want/ This time

Haven’t had a dream/ In a long time/ See, the life I’ve had/ Can make a good man/ Turn bad/ So for once in my life/ Let me get what I want/ Lord knows/ It would be the first time/ Lord knows/ It would be the first time

Conclusion: A missed connection for an “Ugly People Eat Meat” shirt? Are you for realz, lady? We’re as sympathetic to the cause as any unrepentant carnivores can be, but this seems a little absurd. That sure is some serious dedication to freak out your relatives on Thanksgiving (another option, try dying your hair blue one year, not that we’d know from experience or anything), but imagine the potential Internet-hurt and Internet-confusion you might cause this female Morrissey impersonator if she were to stumble upon this. Heaven knows she’ll be miserable now.

//Photo by Oliver Lopena. Have you ever noticed that Smiths song titles are basically Craigslist posts waiting to happen? “Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want,” “I Want The One I Can’t Have,” “This Night Has Opened My Eyes,” um… “Oscillate Wildly?” Whatever, you get the picture.

Earlier this week, Mumford & Sons played four shows in Nashville. Four. How many shows has your crappy band played in one day? And playing in the garage for your mom doesn’t count as one. Their stop at Grimey’s (show #2) turned in to a Basement show due to a litany of reasons that we didn’t quite follow when a Grimey’s employee was chatting with us about them, but it was still a (sorta) free show featuring a band that sold out War Memorial later that night. Lance sacrificed his lunch break last week to drive to Grimey’s from Franklin to secure his spot on the list, which is probably a good thing seeing as how they got swamped with calls and the whole thing probably sold out in a day’s time.

Without further ado, here’s a poorly recorded bootleg of “The Cave.” They had real recording gear there, so you’ll probably be able to hear a less crummy version of it at some point in the future.

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// Photo by Lance Conzett, who regrets not going to the Station Inn “secret show” knowing full well it was happening. Curse you, responsibilities!

This is turning into some kind of a video week, isn’t it? We’ll totally understand if you didn’t think driving to Cookeville for The Night Kite Revival was worth it, but you did miss a pretty great performance if you didn’t decide to drive 3 hours round trip for a poetry show. Words are for nerds, after all. Lance did make the drive, though, and shot bits and pieces of the show. In this clip, Derrick Brown and Buddy Wakefield present short poems. Anis Mojgani said one before he started recording, but because he got lost trying to find the place, he came in a little too late to get him on tape. Sorry, Anis! NWS for language, we guess. If you liked that, you may be interested in buying their books and other wares.

We’d like to take a break from your regularly scheduled hyperlocal (buzzwords! Internet 2.0! INTERNET) snark and encourage you to vote today. Sure, both major party gubernatorial candidates are about as lame as can be and the amount of terrible negative campaign ads makes us want to collect our TVs and radios into a big pile that’d be easily set on fire, but it’s your civic responsibility or whatever. Unless you’ve got a felony conviction on your record. Or you’re an illegal immigrant. Or you’re under 18. Or you’re not registered. Or if you’re the dreaded election day strangler. Then you should probably stay home. Sorry. Them’s the breaks.

If you’re not sure where you’re supposed to pull levers for democracy, you can get that information from the state or Google. We think we trust Google a little more.

// Photo by Christy Frink. Let’s all just write in Basil Marceaux. He makes more sense than those two other dopes anyway.

This week, we bring you an urban art crawl first. It’s an Urban Art Crawl mystery! This little fellow is said to be displayed in various locations around our beloved city (this one is behind the Kwik-Sak on West End) and it looks like he’s holding something rather ambiguous. Is it a guitar? Is it a penis? What does it all mean? We’ll let you be the judge, but our bet is on penis.

// Photo by Lance Conzett, who really, really hopes it’s a guitar.

Ra Ra Riot played a short set at Grimey’s on Saturday afternoon. Chances are pretty good that you overdid it on Friday night and slept through the in-store. There’s no shame in that. Well, there’s a little shame in that. But don’t fret, hungover indie pop fan. We were there with a video camera to capture a bit of the show for posterity. They only played three songs, so you didn’t miss a whole lot. This was song #2, “Shadowcasting,” off their new record The Orchard.

// Video by Lance Conzett, who barely knows what he’s doing. Excuse the shakiness.

Look, we know we do this every week and all, but your best bet for Halloween is always stalking your friends on Facebook to find out where the best rager is going down. But in case all of those “might attend” RSVPs really mean “not if it was the only Halloween party on the planet and members of the Beatles resurrected as vampires were playing,” you’ve got other options.

FRIDAY

Rocky Horror Picture Show – The Belcourt – Midnight, $Scalping

The annual tradition returns and guess what? It’s already sold out! If you didn’t already get your tickets to the midnight movie classic (featuring a live cast and heaping amounts of banter with varying degrees of cruelty), you’re out of luck. See this pretty funny but also serious Facebook note penned by the Belcourt. However, if you’re really lucky, you might be able to find somebody selling their tickets outside if the babysitter falls through or if they’re hit with a sudden wave of shame after squeezing into fishnets and a corset. But don’t hold your breath. Also happening tomorrow night (which, too, is sold out).

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It was about four years ago when we first saw Matthew Armando Apache Putay open for The Protomen as Make-Up and Vanity Set. These were the days when the Protos were still playing The End and played the first album from front to back at every show, before All Tomorrow’s Parties made that sort of thing cool. It was a weird period of time where we first heard about Make-Out with Violence from “Lazerman and the Non-Commissioned Officers” and when the aforementioned Mr. Putay was laying down electro jams in a fashion that could be best described as somewhat awkward.

He set up on the stage, he didn’t really say much, we were a little baffled by the ski mask that he wore while playing, but the electro dance music wasn’t bad. He just didn’t bring the party as hard as he could have. Peoples’ arms were still crossed and shit, which is par for the course in Nashville. Fast-forward to about two months ago, where he’s commanding an impromptu dance competition that encircled where he was playing on the floor, in front of the stage. It’s not easy to get self-conscious dweebs to get down and the self-conscious dweeb is the main demographic of Protomen fans (we say that as both), but he makes it happen. Respect.

MAVS just released the follow-up to Charles Park, appropriately named Charles Park II, this week. Just in time for Halloween, the record is crammed full of electro zombie jams. It sounds like an obscure John Carpenter movie. Like, what would happen if somebody make a dance music version of In the Mouth of Madness. “Deathwalker” totally sounds like that scene where Sam Neill is running away from book monsters. Or whatever the hell is going on in that movie. If you’re having a party, you could do a lot worse than this as the background music. It’s only five bucks. Or, we guess you can just stream it on Bandcamp if you’re gonna be a jerk about it.

Honorable Mention: We were going to do this thing on Shaboi before MAVS came out of nowhere and dropped this in our laps. But any self-respecting Halloween partier is going to have at least a couple Shaboi songs in their playlist. Best of all, the record is free. Also, if you haven’t seen In the Mouth of Madness, you can watch the whole thing on YouTube.

// Photo by Lance Conzett.

The countdown to Halloween weekend has begun, and what better way to kick things off than with an utterly terrifying personal ad. This week, we bring you Tater Tots, a mistress of the Missed Connections who just can’t seem to get over her extremely famous ex.

Person of Craigslist: Tater Tots

Category: Missed Connections

Who Is She:

Your in my heart forever.I cant seem to “move” on from you.My feelings for you wont leave me….Ive tryed.I deleted your phone number from my phone today after I text you.Maby that will help me.You have moved on…I can tell your very happy with your wife again.I want happiness for you.Just know Im in love with you and was ready to be with you forever.I believed all you told me and said to me for the past 4 years.Soul mate is what you are to me.Please be happy with your life.My heart has sunk into a new low and its hard for me to breath.I hate being without you.I love you and always will.I pray that you love her and have made the right choice.I love you Superman.

Conclusion: Say it ain’t so, Superman! Whatever happened to truth, justice, the American way and not cheating on your wife with the kind of person who will post on Craigslist about it? We thought you were better than that. But, then again, we did see Superman Returns, a movie that is built on the premise that Superman is a deadbeat dad. Worse yet, a deadbeat dad who used his superpowers to erase his baby mama’s memory in the preceding movie (what a dick move!). Maybe you’re better off without him, T2.

// Photo by Travis K.